Save Becky has become a world-wide sensation.  Since it’s inception on Sunday, Feb 8th, it’s had over 2,500 hits from 10 different countries: United States, Canada, United Kingdom, Australia, Austria, Singapore, Costa Rica, Germany, Trinidad and Tobago and Argentina.  Apparently, the word is spreading, and I have received e-mails from all walks of life.  A lot of readers are asking me to put the comments back up on the blog and also put the donations link back up.  The reason I took the comments down was because people were bad-mouthing not only me, but Harry as well.  I can take it, but he is not here to defend himself.  I might add a page of my replies to the haters because they are really funny.  People are really dumb.  For the time being, the blog comments will stay removed.

I also would like to put some more thought into taking donations.  I took it down because people thought I was trying to “profit” from Harry’s death, which couldn’t be further from the truth.  If I put the link back up, people will still think this, but I will be be $1 closer to a new life with each donation.   I got an e-mail from an ex-coworker that said: “Become an adult, and do without for the next few years and pay off the balance.  Sorry but you can’t expect people to feel bad for you.  You created the life you have now.”  Isn’t that SWEET?  She was always a PEACH.   I didn’t create the problems I had, except the debt.  I do not want others to feel bad for me, I want others to help me get back to the person I once was.  Since comments are banned, send your thoughts on the donations to my e-mail. I would love to hear what everyone else has to say.

It’s almost been 3 weeks.  Tomorrow.  It really feels like a blur.  I went back there last night and cleaned out our junk drawers.  For 3 years, I don’t know if anything has ever come out of there, but it’s amazing how many things I found that have gone in: 2 different size light bulbs (without packaging), new gift tags from years ago, fly paper, a multi-purpose funnel and easter egg color dippers.  It’s these types of things I was unsure what to do with.  Perhaps I’d have a fly problem in a new apartment, and might need fly paper 2 years from now?  Or maybe might need to pour liquid into a bottle?  Or want to color easter eggs?  So I just kept it all.  It’s all in a pile on the desk now instead of in the drawers.
I broke down and cried when I was going through Harry’s night table and found the ad I designed in the NY Post from January 20th, two days before he died.  I had brought home the paper to show him that day, he said he was so proud of me but I didn’t know he had kept it.  Last week, in his closet, I found a bag of torn up notes.  We had a big fight two years ago and I took all the notes he gave me and I ripped them up.  Then, in retaliation he did it to all my notes too.  We made up but I never noticed that the notes had gone missing.  I guess he took them all and kept them, they were all in this big ziplock bag.  I have so many notes Harry wrote me after that, but maybe one day I’ll tape together the ones in the bag too.

I have removed the option to leave comments on this blog.   If you would like to respond, please send me an e-mail. I will be creating a page with snippets from all the supportive e-mails I have received to date, probably tomorrow, or Friday.  These kind e-mails are keeping me going, so please keep them coming.  If you have nothing nice to say, move on, please.

Hi Everyone.  If you are here, that means hopefully you have read my story.  The past year has been a roller coaster of emotions, each horrible occurrence unknowingly making me a stronger person. The loss of Harry on January 22nd literally changed my life and I haven’t known how to deal with it.  I’ve never lost anyone so close with me.   I bought a book about grief and it encourages you to journal about your feelings.  I decided to create this site instead as an outlet for me to vent, cry and share with everyone.  I not only lost Harry that night, I lost his daughter Emily, our cat Mitzie (Emily took her), my apartment and my life.  I hope that if anything, this site will encourage others to cherish everything you have in life, you never know when it might be taken away.  Thanks for reading.