Harry’s birthday was yesterday.  He would have been 33. Since he’s passed away, I’ve made it through Valentine’s Day and July 4th. Independence day was hard for me since that was always our time of the year to have a vacation alone. I pretty much curled myself in a ball & didn’t get out of bed the whole day. He’s been gone for over 6 months & I still cry every day. He was the light of my life. He made me smile when I was sad, made me laugh till my cheeks hurt.  I wish I could just have one more minute with him. I wish I would have not rushed out the door that morning without kissing him goodbye.  They say guilt comes early in the grief process, but I still feel it every day. I probably always will.  Happy Birthday Harry. I hope you have found the peace that you searched for. You are terribly missed.
A belated Happy Birthday, Harry.
Hi Becky,
Speaking for myself, I have found that losing someone close to you is the most painful event that I have ever encounter in my life. My father passed away almost two years ago and I still cry about it. He and I were close. I am going through a pretty stressful time right now and I wish so much that he was here.
Harry sounds like he was a good guy and that he loved you very much. It’s good to know that you can remember all of the fun, silly stuff you shared with him.
I wish that I could tell you that I know how you feel, but I can’t. Why? Because every relationship is different. But what I can tell you is this: Be kind to yourself. And despite what many people say, there aren’t any neat, clear cut steps in the so-called grieving process. And it takes as long as it will take. And you know what? That’s okay.
And you are right. Guilt does sit on your emotional doorstep early on.
So. . .Happy Birthday Harry.
Such a heartfelt blog post. Beautiful picture! The one you share and the one in your heart.
God Bless,
Martha
Happy Birthday Harry.
I wish I could say it gets easier with time, but I don’t know that. I’ve never lost someone as close to me as Harry was to you and still had a sufficient “grieving period”. Is there even such a thing?
Don’t beat yourself up about what happened. Just remember the good times you had.
Becky,
I totally feel for you and know how funny he was, I also know that he would never blame you or want you to feel guilty for that! There are “stages” but there is no order to them…It gets easier to get through a day as time goes on, but you will feel it and it’s ok…if you ever need/want to chat, I am here
Keep taking awesome care of his little girl:)
You are in my thoughts,
Tiffany